Married for 27 years and I am 45 years old and I am not interested in sex. Is this normal? Or any solutions?

I have been married for 27 years and my husband wants sex and I am not interested at all. I want to know if there are other women who are my age and have been married as long as I have who experience the same thing. If you are in a long time relationship like mine and still have a desire, what is the secret?Married for 27 years and I am 45 years old and I am not interested in sex. Is this normal? Or any solutions?
I am not your age but I know this is normal. You may be starting menopause and that has alot to do with it. You should see your obgyn to give you some info on this. There may be something to help you.Married for 27 years and I am 45 years old and I am not interested in sex. Is this normal? Or any solutions?
I'm almost 45, married for 21 years and having lots of sex and desire for sex.





Not knowing you, it is hard to say. But here are some things to consider: Do you like and love your husband? It could be medical - low hormones (our bodies do really start to change before menopause). Have you had a decent sex drive and then it went away? Are you happy in your life? Do you have symptoms of depression (also often hormonal)? How do you feel about your body? Sometimes body image can affect sex drive. I'm not talking about how you look, but how you feel about how you look. To feel sexy, you must be comfortable with yourself (and all the changes that come as we age...).





Think about your life as far as health, emotions, your connection with your husband, etc.





If you find no reason from the above suggestions, I will tell you it requires effort to have a good marriage and a good sex life. My husband and I worked to get a good marriage and then we worked on the sex life. We both make an effort to tease and taunt each other with lots of touching, etc. We laugh a lot and enjoy each others company. The sex is the best ever and very fun.





Hope this helps - good luck.
in a marital book i was reading it said something like having sex with your husband is part of the covenant that we made when we got married. She compared it to not always feeling like fixing your kids dinne, if you had any, but knowing that they had to eat. Not always feeling like cleaning up, but knowing it needed to be done. She said to think of it as a need for your spouse and that will help get you in the mood more and become more initiative. Men are always physical creatures just like women need nice words and affection. Think of it less as a chore and more as a fun and new experience. And try some new things to spice it up.
I feel for you. I'm not your age nor have I been in such a long relationship but I did have a thought -- when I was in my twenties my sex drive was like nil for some reason. My boyfriend dealt with it surprisingly well, year after year. Finally, I decided to try something in order to get more on the same page as he was. I did this (sorry if this is gross, but) um.. I used a certain toy like once a day until I actually looked forward to sex. Hope this helps.
The thing is, is it that its your husband? What would happen if it were somebody else? I bet you would be interested. I am saying that special someone who you know and think about occasionally.
I work for an OB/GYN and this is very common at your age. Please call and make an appointment to go and talk to him/her. There is help out there.





Of course if you don't want help, I don't know what to tell you. Role play? Fantasize? Dress up?
Ouch! Perhaps if the relationship is doomed get the man anther woman and do a threesome to send him off right!
Join the club.It could be hormonal or medication or depression.or your just plain tired.who needs it I don't
you are going through the change of life.see if you can get on some hormone replacement medication that would help.
I felt the same way mid life crisis? just have sex and fake it. Believe me they don't know the difference
Just because you don't want it doesn't mean that the man you love doesn't want it anymore, either. He is still hot for your bod, and comes to you for pleasure, so my advice to you is: Do it anyway.





Not out of duty, or thru clenched teeth ... but because you love your husband and want please him.





There are other things that you do, even when you don't want to, that are FAR less appealing than letting your husband get pleasure from your body.





Why don't you try this: Focus on sex for a week. Think about it every hour. Remember the best times you've had in your whole life (not just with your husband). Take 3 minutes and really re-live all those intense orgasms, how they made you feel, and how wonderful it is to be wanted by your man. Do things for yourself that make you feel sexy, whether it's wearing high heels, putting on make-up, wearing perfume, wearing sexy underwear - do sexy things for yourself every single day. If you haven't been touching yourself, it's definitely time to start doing that again - every day, even if you don't orgasm, just touch and feel and remember how you used to like having your man touch you like that. If you don't have any vibrating toys, devices or implements that you use to give yourself pleasure, I can't recommend highly enough that you GET ONE. Show him how you like to use it (trust me on this one - it is foolproof, for you both). Once a day, walk up to your husband and kiss him - I mean, really kiss him, for more than 5 seconds. Tell him that you're trying, ok?





I have to ask you ... who wouldn't want to have an orgasm ? What's not to like?





If you really put your mind to it, you can get your sexy back. You just have to want it bad enough. HE DOES !





Best of luck !!